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PSY - Psychology of Aging - Textbook

The Facts of Existence in Aging Male lover Men


Older gay men have the equal desire for physical and emotional love as do younger ones. As they age, however, they may be fit to step off what one penner described as “the unconscious, relentless, mechanical treadmill of desire.”

They’re still active sexually. The pattern of sexual activity a man had in his youth tends to persist as he ages. In several surveys, as many as three quarters of same-sex attracted men report creature happy with their sexual life. In some studies over half of these men reported having sex at least once a week with a companion and this is in addition to the masturbating that most men also do.

They know more about what turns them on and are less self-conscious about asking for it. Having more free time, less stressful work lives, and more self-acceptance contribute to an enhanced sense of sexual possibilities.

The highly valued sexual encounter tends to move from the guide directly to orgasm to a fuller erotic life. Fondness , cuddling and feeling closeness are increasi

Archive of Our Own beta

Jay had always known his place in the world. He was strong, confident, and in control. An alpha through and through.

At least, that’s what he’d always been told. And he had no reason to interrogate it.

“Your results are clear.” The doctor's tone was even, firm. “You are, in fact, an omega.”

Jay froze. His breath stalled. The world around him seemed to tilt.

“I’m a what?”

or:

Jay has always been a strong, confident alpha—until the day his body betrays him. What was supposed to be doomed happens: he experiences a heat. The truth is undeniable. He’s not an alpha. He’s an omega.

But in his world, there’s no place for omegas, especially not in his group. Desperate to maintain the life he’s built, Jay goes into hiding, doing whatever it takes to suppress his subgender, to erase every impression of what he’s become.

Thomas Gass, a dentist in California, has survived the curse—twice. The curse? Gass is a gay human whose only sexual attraction is to men significantly older than he is.

Gass lost his first significant other , 28 years his senior, through the slowly failing effects of Lou Gehrig’s disease after they had been together for 13 years. After recovering from his grief, he create love again with a man 18 years older but endured another tragic loss when his second partner died of pancreatic cancer after they had spent 17 years together. Still a relatively new man, Gass might wonder whether or not to take a chance on loving an older dude again. For him, however, the choice is between an older man or no man at all. Gass and his friends—all of whom had clueless older life partners—have labeled their abiding sexual attraction “the curse of creature attracted to older men.”

I began to study lgbtq+ relationships with age disparities while conducting research for my book, Finally Out: Letting Go of Living Straight. Gass and I started to correspond after he and his friends had read and discussed my essay

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